Dead tired

Past midnight, I arrive home. Arriving early, if you consider I've been hitting the sheets only with the first rays of daylight, lately. But I'm tired. Of working, of making part of a system I just can't understand, of enslaving my art for someone else's profit, I dunno. I don't intend to get into "that hippie crap" again, it's not even about any anti-corporative speech, it's just that I don't believe in what I am doing. I somehow can't put my heart on it, unlike any other shitty job I've ever had. For some time I could even enjoy it as an uncompromised joke. Right now it's just not funny anymore.

I was reading about Angus T. Jones, the young actor from "Two And  Half Men", and one of the most highly paid actors in Hollywood. So the little fellow was practically raised on the set of the most sexist TV series ever, and still found his way to the church, found Jesus and today recomends that people should "stop watching that crap". Makes me wonder how no matter what is happening in our lives, and how much of something surrounds us, things can always turn 180º in the most unexpected way.

I look at my empty bed, looking for a glimpse of Red. I wish I could wake him from his sleep with my wet caresses, but tonight I'm just too tired to be frustrated, making up dreams that I know are so far from reach.

Let him sleep while I turn on my vibrator, to cum and fall asleep faster than I would write the first two lines of the bedtime stories he inspires me every night.